Monday, August 31, 2009

Change and loss

In any connection, any relationship, things change. Even when they change for the better, as when a child grows up and becomes a self-sustaining adult, there can be a sense of loss attached to that change. I find myself in a space with many changes going on, and experiencing some sense of loss with those changes.

As PG continues to work through his stuff, there is a need for more space. It's different, and that change is a loss. As S moves towards the new connection he's making, it's a new era for our relationship, and as happy and excited as I am for the two of them, it is different. Even as we look toward the future with optimism, love, and support, I will miss what has gone before.

There is no such thing as stasis within relationships, so fighting change is an exercise in futility. Embrace the changes, allow yourself to ride the waves, rather than clawing through the water against the flow. It may just save some time drowning. ;)

1 comment:

designergrl said...

oh hon I Know from which you speak.And like the former mindset of Only being allowed One Love...I will not look upon such an occurrence as something "Bad".

I was having a wistful daydream early this morning before fully awake...and it included my last 2 ex lovers,my "former" best friend(we had sex once but life moved in)...and she is with another now(ahh but still wants me),my current s.o., Her current S.o. and Me....a complex group to be sure....every last one of this "group" have preconcieved notions about each that acceptance, tolerance,peace, LOVE, friendship and Hot Sex will not happen.....but Oh Boy,I wished we'd all grow up and just Get On with it!;)