Saturday, January 10, 2009

Poly consciousness


Yes, it's all over the place! Poly consciousness is out there and gaining more and more steam, even in the past year. There is a link on the side of our blog to an article in which was mentioned a personal development guru, one Steve Pavlina. You see, Steve came out as poly-interested in his New Year's blog article. Having a pretty substantial presence on the web, there has been a bit of an uproar from his following. Anything from "it's the next logical evolution as one explores and becomes more enlightened", to a whole thread about "Steve's midlife crisis".

Now, I don't know a whole lot about Steve myself, but I did enjoy the writing he did regarding his ascent into polyamory. Also, it was great to see that he's tackling a lot of the homework in advance of actually forming a relationship, which is a stage most poly people seem to skip. I think I might actually try to follow along and see how that journey goes!

There are so many things that you can't learn from the pages of a book, or a blog for that matter, but can recognize in the words of others after the fact. Everyone has assumptions about how a given course of action is going to work out for them, and then it takes it own organic (and largely unforeseen) path to suit your personal growth.

Take us for example: The very first person that I really connected with when we were looking at swinging turned into a six year intensely emotional relationship. Originally, PG didn't have a lot of time to devote to looking into things on a personal level, so it took at while for him to connect with someone strongly, but he also found recreational sex to not be enough. Now he's the most actively social member of our household! S was muddling along in serial monogamy when I smacked him upside the head with another possibility and he just jumped! We all ended up taking paths to this current destination that we wouldn't have expected at the outset. I'm about 10-15 years ahead of the timetable that I sort of flirted with in my head. It's amazing how things come into focus in ways far more comprehensive than our original vision.

So here's to you Steve, and to your wife Erin, as you embark on this new phase of your relationship with each other, and with yourselves. Thank you for being bold enough to be vulnerable to the eyes of others as you explore this new place. Welcome to the community!

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