Wednesday, June 24, 2009

The Fulcrum's Balancing Act

Polyfulcrum (PF) earns her name from being the center-point in the Vee between Polygestalt (PG) and I. As the "fulcrum", she has to diplomatically balance attention from her two partners.

That's a unique responsibility: when conversation or physical attention like hand-holding is coming from one of us, she'll deliberately reach over and hold the other's hand, or, touch us in some way, like, with her feet, if we're on the couch together.

When she's spent some time during the evening with one of us, she'll usually pop into the other room and spend a few quality minutes with the other before returning to bed, just to let us know she's there.

If we're in public, she usually puts her arms through both of ours. And at a restaurant, if she sat near me last time, she'll sit next to PG.

That's what makes her great at this and probably why we all get along so well. PF is conscious of the amount of attention that she pays to each of us and is very cognizant of the fact that constant, little, shared amounts of attention go a long way to introduce harmony and level-off whatever jealousy that might arise.

Last night, I came home from another date around 11pm and was getting into bed. She slipped out of her bed with PG and spent a few minutes with me to ask me how the date went and catch a few minutes of cuddle-time, and after about ten minutes, she returned back to bed with PG. Her touching-base with me like that just demonstrates how great she is at maintaining our connection and letting me know she was thinking about me while I was out.

Fulcrum's within a Vee have a unique role to play. Luckily for us, PF plays it pretty well; she's a great role model for anyone who has to handle the rough balancing act between two lovers.


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