Thursday, November 20, 2008

Poly "in-laws"

PF- Apparently, I'm doing the blog this month...

This upcoming weekend, S's parents are coming to visit the area. While he is out as poly to his folks, I don't think that he has a great deal of confidence that they understand what that actually _means_. As we are hosting a Thanksgiving meal in our home, he figured it might be important to give them more details on the specifics of our arrangements before they hit the door for Turkey Day. He's looking to hopefully cover that this weekend while they are at the coast. Hence, I will be meeting my poly in-laws.

Now, it's not that I've never laid eyes on these people before. I've met them at both of S's weddings! LOL As a matter of fact, PG was the Best Man at the most recent iteration. However, this will be the first time I've met them as anything other than one of his friend's wives. This is leading to a smidgen of anxiety.

It seems like I've often been seen as a corrupting influence on people. Eroding their moral fiber with my loose ways and open perspectives. In this particular case, I feel very strongly that my influence, although non-standard in application, has been positive pretty thoroughly across the board for both S and his daughter. I'm trying not to get locked into the desire to have these people like me, or see those things, and instead remain a stable supportive influence as he's going through the stresses of coming out more completely to parents.

So far, PG's mom has been the most positive experience in sharing that information, and even that took a few discussions, repeated exposure to those we share love with, and seeing that her grandchild (or son) isn't being neglected or damaged by our decisions.

So S, I will do my level best to stay out of my ego, and present in the moment while you are sharing your life with your parents. I will be my charming loving self, and hope that seeing you happy resonates more strongly than how you got there.

No comments: